This post is long overdue.

This morning I was running late for the bus (…as usual) and somehow I got all red lights on the way to the bus stop. Now, this bus will take you from this particular stop, to all the way to my school. And I take the last bus going inbound. So of course it’d really suck if I missed it. Well guess what?!  I MISSED IT! The worst part is that the bus was right there. And I literally missed it by thirty seconds. Why? Because the stupid ginger bus driver is a …female dog (my mom told me to stop swearing). Further proof that gingers have no souls. My friend was on the bus. She said the driver saw me, but she gave no effs.

This bus driver is relatively new. There used to be two other drivers who were really nice, but she took over their routes and she’s a jerk. But its not just the drivers that I hate. Its the people riding on the bus too. There’s always that one person on the bus who just forces everyone to hate them. For me, its this chick who always rides the bus on Fridays. She talks on her phone the whole time really loudly. And usually they’re very personal, possibly disgusting conversations that no one wants to hear. Like how she got drunk and kissed a girl. Or how she ruined a wedding. Or how Amy totally got wasted at that wedding but don’t tell Josh what she said when she was drunk and don’t let him know that she’s smoking again. Or she will watch stupid shows on her laptop….out loud! Some people have zero manners.

And then there are the people who don’t take crap from anyone and scare the living daylights out of me. Every time I try to decline my seat, the large African American woman behind me kicks my seat. Mind you, I’m not that jerk who reclines their seat all the way back. I just tried to move two inches, maybe less, and then she started kicking my freaking seat. This has happen at least four times to me.

But worse than that is when you have to sit next to a stranger. Because then there’s the age old battle to claim your territory. Let’s get something straight. I’m tiny. I don’t take up much space. I’ve decided that this is the reason that… gravity generous people like to sit by me on the bus. Because then they’re free to take up HALF OF MY SEAT. I have nothing else to say about that.

The last type of person I hate is the middle aged nurse who sneakily eats trail mix out of her purse during the whole ride, then decides that shes having a hot flash and takes off twelve coats and pulls out a mini fan. But in my head I just call her GET YOUR ELBOWS OUT OF MY RIBS YOU WITCH.

Moral of the story: I hate public transportation, and that female dog hates me back.